Canoeing Is A Lot Like Relationships
If you have ever canoed, you know that there is some skill needed for the forward movement of the boat. Like canoeing, happy partner-relationships require some skill to successfully arrive to their destination.
When you are singly in a canoe, you are responsible for the steering and the forward movement of the boat. It all falls to you, the solo paddler.
That changes when there are two of you in the canoe.
If you’ve canoed with a partner, one sits in the front and one sits in the back of the boat. The one in the front is responsible for paddling, while the one in the back is responsible for steering the canoe.
There is a synchronicity of paddling and steering that has to occur for the canoe to move easily and efficiently in the direction of the destination.
Relationships are SO like that. You are both in the boat together and both responsible for contributing to the forward motion of your relationship. Like canoeing, your responsibilities are a bit different.
Same goal: the destination.
Same vehicle: the relationship.
Same skill level: not always.
If you are fighting about who is steering the relationship (like the canoe), you will not get to the destination as quickly as you would if you had synchronicity. How do you develop this synchronicity?
Study! Learn what great relationships are about. Learn the science of relationships so that you can become skillful and even artful in working with your partner.
Define! What’s your vision – the one common to you both. If you’re not both headed in the direction of the same destination, there will be no synchronicity – your focus is different from each other’s.
Roles! There have to be roles. If both of you are doing the steering – how does that work? Who’s paddling? Maybe one of you needs to steer AND paddle. Maybe the roles change and morph as life evolves or throws some curve-balls your way.
Every relationship has its own magical formula that is proprietary to itself. That magical formula produces the synchronicity necessary to paddle off into a beautiful sunset together, on your way to that common vision.
Put some work into your relationship and the return of synchronicity will amaze and delight you!